Kululu's birthday of doom
by Rainbowkittyblossomwings
Summary: Kululu's birthday is today. What will the platoon do? Will they celebrate it or avoid him to save their lives? Will Kululu have a fun birthday or will he make everyone have the worst day of their lives?


**Happy Kululu's birthday!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own sgt frog. Never did. Wish I will.**

* * *

The fated day had come, the day that everyone hated, the day that they all dreaded. Kululu's birthday.

Of course Kululu hated it too, because nothing really happened on that day because nobody really cared enough to give him presents. Or do anything. Nobody besides his siblings had even wished him a happy birthday, and even they sometimes forgot or purposely avoided him on that day. But this year was different. The platoon knew what day it was, and they were dreading it. As long as other's were having misfortune Kululu was happy. He wanted to bring everyone down with him.

"Ku, ku, ku….As my platoon of course they'll be determined to give me presents out of pity. Might as well insult them until they're miserable." Kululu decided, he hummed to himself determined to ruin everyone's day like their expectations had been set. Although deep down the yellow frog wondered if they would even do anything or pretend not to know due to wanting their lives. Kululu laughed, he knew that would not happy. They were too stupid to take the path that led to survival.

Kululu walked into the meeting room confidently, knowing that his presence would induce fear into the platoon's hearts.

"Hello, captain. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu greeted, putting an extra effort to induce fear into the green keronians soul.

"Ah. Hi, Kululu. The invasion meetings already started to could you take a seat and try not to interrupt?" Keroro requested. Kululu looked confused. His hello hadn't generated any fear at all.

"All right. Ku, ku, ku….Nah. Now that I feel think about it, I don't feel like it." Kululu decided just to tick off his commanding officer. He looked at him waiting for his response.

"You don't get any special privileges just because you're a year older. Honestly we don't care." Keroro responded harshly.

_Ouch. _Kululu thought, _So they knew what day it was and they had decided to take the I don't care track….Hmm….How to make them know today is a day that they'll hate._

"Ku, ku, ku. Don't you think that's a little harsh, captain? I mean when you're birthday came up all you could talk about was you. You forced us all to celebrate too." Kululu smirked knowing he had brought up Keroro's selfishness, Keroro began to sweat showing slight discomfort.

"Well yes….But…..Honestly as soon as we figured out today was your birthday we knew exactly what you would do. Make our day miserable. So we voted as a platoon whether to even care if it was your birthday or not. And we all decided no. I mean we even talked to the pekoponians, they all voted no too. We've decided just to ignore you and not find you important today." Keroro explained.

"Wow. Ku, ku, ku. I love how hated I am. Dororo, even you voted to ignore me?" Kululu asked curiously knowing the ninja was way to kind to do such a thing. Dororo began to fidget.

"…W-well….Um….Y-yes…You see Kululu, you've been a real jerk…You even forgot my birthday, (like everyone else except Koyuki and Giroro.) so I actually helped inform the pekoponians to not acknowledge you." Dororo admitted. Kululu in took some air. He hadn't expected Dororo to do that.

"Giroro-senpai…You didn't ignore me right?" Kululu asked being extra flirtatious to creep him out.

"Heck yes! I happily voted against you! I even helped influence Natsumi to not show pity on you." Giroro smirked.

"I didn't want to do anything either!" Tamama piped up, "Neither did Momocchi or Fukki."

"Ku, ku, ku. I feel so proud. Well, even though you won't celebrate I'm going to celebrate with my curry so I'll be leaving. Adios!" Kululu smirked and left making sure to accidentally trip a couple chairs making them fall down before leaving to the lab. In the lab he sat in his chair just thinking to himself.

_Ku, ku, ku. I deserved this, but….I can't believe that everyone voted against me….People are so stupid. Some of them should have taken today to suck up to me to try to get themselves to live the rest of the year. Ku, ku, ku._ Kululu thought, even though secretly he had hoped his platoon had said at least 'Happy birthday.' It wasn't like Kululu felt lonely…Okay, so he did. He had actually hoped to have a real birthday this year, but that definitely wouldn't be happening. Kululu felt a rock in his stomach of sorrow and disappointment, a rock that he was used to. He took a plate of curry and began to munch on it, knowing that he was the only one who would ever give himself a birthday. He heard a knock on the lab door. He didn't move to open it. But it opened on its own.

"Kululu….Are you okay?" Angol Mois asked coming inside.

"Ku, ku, ku. Fine. Why do you ask? And what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at the invasion meeting?" Kululu asked putting away his curry and wondering why she had come to bother him.

"I…D-ditched…." She admitted stuttering a bit at her confession of disobeying her Uncle's orders.

"Good for you. Ku, ku, ku. What do you want?" Kululu asked genuinely pleased that the girl was beginning to grow a spine.

"I wanted to see how you were like doing. I mean everyone did vote to not pay attention to your birthday…." She trailed off.

"Yep. So why did you come? Didn't you vote to ignore me too?" Kululu asked. Angol Mois bit her lip.

"Uncle didn't let me vote. I wanted to celebrate your birthday." She answered. Kululu looked at her a bit in awe. Someone actually wanted to celebrate? "It was mean of him to do that to you."

"I deserved it." Kululu answered.

"No you didn't!" She replied, "And anyway, don't you want everyone to celebrate and wish you a happy birthday?" She asked.

"No. Why should I care? Nobody's ever celebrated it before." He answered honestly. Angol Mois looked down sad.

"This year will be different then. Everyone will celebrate you're birthday." She smiled, "You're going to have a happy birthday." She looked into his eyes confidently.

"How do you propose that?" Kululu asked curiously. She smiled at him.

"Secret~." She hummed and then skipped out of his lab. Kululu watched her go curious of why she was so determined. He smiled to himself, secretly glad that someone cared.

A few hours later there was a knock on the lab door. Kululu hopped out of his chair and opened the door hoping to see Angol Mois again. Instead he saw a piece of paper on the ground. It read, "Come to the sitting room." He did as it instructed. As soon as he entered the sitting room he saw everyone waiting for him.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY KULULU!" They shouted out at him and threw confetti. They smiled wide, almost as if they were doing it out of terror.

"I brought a cake for you as a present!" Momoka was the first to speak out of the group, letting him see a huge cake made out of curry rise up from the floor.

"Yum." Kululu said ogling the curry-cake.

"Uh…We all got you presents…." Keroro admitted. He handed him a wrapped box. Kululu quickly opened it unused to getting gifts. It was a Gundam. "Treasure it forever…A Gundam is like a baby-" Keroro was cut off as Kululu lit the Gundam aflame. "AHHH! What are you doing to it?" He screamed.

"Burning it. I hate Gundam, ku, ku, ku." Kululu laughed. Keroro went to the corner to sob. Natsumi was the next to come forward with her present, after opening it he saw another Gundam.

"It's one I stole from the stupid frog. Destroy it as you please." She answered. Kululu grinned widely.

"Best present ever." He disassembled it and destroyed. Keroro sobbed harder.

Tamama skipped up to him. Kululu opened a box of curry-candy.

"Thanks…" He answered him grateful for the curry.

"Oh that's not all." Tamama handed him another gift which was soon revealed to be a Kulumois doujinshi, "Hope you get together with that woman so I can have the sergeant all to myself!" He smiled. Kululu had nothing to say. He quickly hid the present away in a place he called 'to keep'

Giroro-senpai…Do you have anything for me?" Kululu asked batting his nonexistent eyelashes. Giroro walked forward and handed him a gun.

"I didn't want to get you a present creep, but because I had too…" His eyes darted to the side as if he was fearful of something, "I got you a gun." He ran away before Kululu could say anything or use it.

"I got you some flowers!" Dororo smiled handing him some flowers, "I'm sorry for not seeing the light about your birthday but after some…Er…Convincing…I now understand that I must celebrate it." Dororo smiled although he too had his eyes dart to the side as if fearful of something. He rushed off with his ninja skills.

"I got you some curry!" Koyuki smiled handing him her gift and leaving.

"Me too! Cuz honestly I didn't know what you wanted!" Fuyuki admitted.

"I made you a poem. Cool whatever, yellow is like gray they both have everything to do with me." Saburo recited. "Happy B-day." He paused "To me I hope."

He was kicked out of the party.

Kululu smiled to himself happy that he everyone had actually done something for him. He wondered to himself how Angol Mois had made it possible. Remembering Angol Mois, he whirled around to look for her, and saw her standing quietly to herself at the edge of the room. He walked up to her.

"T-thanks for all of this…" Kululu admitted, "You are the one responsible right?" Angol Mois nodded shyly. She then leaned down and handed him a neatly wrapped box with a card attached.

"I wanted to get you a gift too…" She admitted. Kululu carefully unwrapped the box to see some new dissection tools, more beautiful than he had ever seen before, one knife made out of solid gold and another one made out of what seemed to be bones. Each tool was made out of a different material. It looked as if they were hand made too. He opened the card that was attached to read it. It read as follows:

Dear Kululu,

I hope you have the most amazing birthday ever. Like I hope it's full of joy and wonder and that you smile all day. I know you were sad about how you were always alone on your birthday and nobody really celebrated it…

I wanted to tell you how you are the most amazing and kindest person in the universe. You're smart, beautiful and funny. You deserve for everyday to be happy to you so I thought I'd help make your day a little brighter.

You're my whole universe and you keep my days bright so I thought I could do the same.

Happy birthday, Kululu, my best friend, my soul mate, and the most important thing in the universe to me.

Love,

Angol Mois

Kululu blushed as he finished the letter.

"T-thank you…" He stuttered, never having someone say such nice things to him before.

"No problem." She smiled.

"So…The way you ended this letter…Love….Is that true? Ku, ku, ku?" Kululu asked embarrassed. Angol Mois blushed.

"Who couldn't like love you?" She smiled, "I like haven't given you your last gift." She smirked as if she had gained newfound confidence and leaned down and kissed Kululu on the lips, causing him to blush harder. His eyes darted to the side to see if anybody was watching. When he concluded no eyes were on him, he kissed her back making sure to deepen the kiss.

"Happy birthday, Kululu." She broke apart, "How did you like it? Did you have fun? What was your favorite part?"

"Best birthday ever. But, you….Were my favorite present…." He weakly answered, clenching her hand. They both smiled at each other and stared into each other's eyes, they finally spun down to the lab to continue being with each other.

After a while of kissing Kululu finally asked Angol Mois the question he had been curious about.

"How'd you get them all to celebrate my birthday?" He asked

"It's like with the power of persuasion!" She gave a smile to show how kind and innocent she was.

"You're amazing." Kululu kissed her again, enjoying her presence.

* * *

Meanwhile….

"Are we free?" Keroro asked curiously and fearfully.

"I… Think so…" Giroro answered breathing heavily.

"…That was….Terrifying…" Natsumi admitted. Giroro put a hand on her shoulder and held her to comfort her.

"I know….I never want to see that many knives in Angol Mois's hands again…" He admitted.

"I knew that woman was evil!" Tamama yelled.

"I'm just glad Fuyuki-kun wasn't hurt in the massacre…" Momoka breathed a sigh of relief, remembering her lost guards that had been slaughtered.

"That was s-scary…" Fuyuki shivered.

"I know. Who knew Moa-dono was so violent?" Dororo admitted recalling the horrible threats she had made. Koyuki started sobbing from mental scarring.

"Who knew she would go yandere on us?" Keroro concluded still frightened. They all nodded, concluding never to do anything to tick Angol Mois off again. The girl was not as innocent as she seemed.

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**Woot! Finished this story! What do you think? I think if I get enough reviews asking me to continue it I might make a second chapter from Angol Mois's point of view as she threatens everyone.**

**How many of you expected how she persuaded them?**

**Moral of the story: The sweetest and most innocent are always the yandere.**

**Happy birthday Kululu! Hope you had fun!**

**Please review!**


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